Why do men complain (or whine ffs) about it? It's because it's a social norm and an expectation for men, not women. I've seen several women suggest that men shouldn't date if they can't afford it (just men, not women). Women can expect that a man will pay for the first date, and they complain (dare say I, whine) about not being told upfront that it would be 50/50. Men are told to expect to pay for the first date, and can only hope that the woman will chip in.

If you spend money on a man, it's considered a kindness. When men do it, it's the bare minimum. There's no viral tiktocks about men complaining about being taken to Cheesecake Factory, is there?

That being said, I acknowledge that you pay your share of the first date, and I appreciate that. It's like a badge of honor for women to just pay for their share.