Sorry, I disagree, kind of. I think that it is good at focusing on goals and continue to self improve. It becomes problematic when you primarily focus on those things in order to attract a mate. When that attraction doesn't occur, the disappointment can produce resentment and result in more disincentive. I feel like self-improvement should have it's own value, beyond making one more attractive to a potential partner.

Not that I think that men shouldn't try to attract a mate. I just don't think attracting a mate should be the central motivation for major life changes. << I know because I've done this >> That's pretty codependent, even when it works it leads to unhealthy relationships.