Sorry for using "you". I meant it hypothetically.

There is nothing forcing women to look to men for financial stability. You are right, that belief is patriarchal, but there is nothing forcing women to adhere to it. Women who want to be independent can be independent. I encounter independent women every day. They don't spend more than their means in order to achieve a certain standard of beauty. They don't look to men to fund such things either. They achieve the beauty standard that they can afford.

I grew up in the Christian church too. I don't consider myself a Christian anymore. You don't have to either. No one is forcing you to be a Christian.

I'm not condemning anyone. It's their choice. Gold-diggers can be men or women. Again, if someone uses romance to attain a lifestyle that they cannot afford on their own, they are a gold-digger. If someone uses their wealth and status to attract a trophy (wife/husband) then they are a sugar daddy/mama. Gold diggers and Sugar Daddies/Mammas are not victims. They chose each other.

I understand that not ever woman who seeks an affluent man is a gold-digger. It has to do with intent. If she seeks someone who can best provide for a family, that’s not a gold digger.. If she seeks someone who can provider for her, so that she have doesn’t to, well she’s a gold digger